The topic of misunderstanding has many angles to discuss; it’s hard to pick one — tone, choice of words, inflection, context, etc.

Let’s look at teams that have members from other cultures. Now, remember, each group has its own culture, so when you see me use the word culture, it does not only mean different countries; it might mean other departments. The specific word I’ll focus on for this discussion is IDIOM.

Definition

an expression in the usage of a language that is peculiar to itself either in having a meaning that cannot be derived from the conjoined meanings of its elements (such as up in the air for “undecided”) or in its grammatically atypical use of words (such as give way) – Source: Merriam-Webster

While this may all sound like Latin to you, are we indeed that different in today’s modern world? Has the world changed that much? I like the topic of idioms because it’s how many Americans and other cultures communicate. Without awareness, it can be highly confusing for individuals learning English as a second language or those visiting an American culture.

A less formal explanation is that an idiom is a collection of words that together convey a specific meaning, but if you look at each word, they have very different uses.

Examples

These are just a few. As professional speech coaches, we train teams on cross-cultural communication often. During training sessions, we want participants to learn that what makes sense to them may not make sense to someone else. The other person might understand each word, but the collection of words together may have a different meaning. They should be aware of what they are saying, how they are saying it, and confirm understanding.

Imagine your daily conversations at work. How fast do you talk? How much information do you cover during a meeting? You see, your listeners nod and smile. Your talk makes great sense (to you). They express visual responses of understanding when, in reality, they have no clue what you’re saying. Then, you are surprised when the project comes out differently than expected.

Great communicators make an effort to maximize understanding. Perfect? No. However, we can improve our speech to communicate with clarity when we recognize the idioms that have become so ingrained into our speech. The sounds and words we use to communicate our thoughts can make perfect sense to us, but do they make sense to our listeners? If you use an idiom, try explaining it or consider how your listeners will or will not understand it. Give it some thought, and see how being more careful when communicating with people from other cultures does not improve.

Pauses in conversations serve several important functions and are an integral part of effective communication. A pause can signal the end of one thought and the beginning of another; a break between two related thoughts can give the speaker a moment to gather their thoughts or indicate that the speaker is searching for the right words. Pauses can also convey the speaker’s emotions, such as hesitation, uncertainty, or discomfort.

In some cultures, long pauses are considered a sign of disrespect or disinterest; in others, they are seen as a sign of reflection or respect for the listener. For example, in some Asian cultures, pausing before answering a question is customary to show respect for the person who asked the question and to show that the speaker is considering their response carefully. SSee Talk is silver, silence is golden: A cross-cultural study on the usage of pauses in speech for more information.

Pauses can also be used strategically in conversation. For example, a speaker may pause to emphasize a point or create suspense. A well-timed pause can indicate the speaker’s confidence and control over the conversation. In contrast, an awkward or lengthy pause can signal nervousness, discomfort, confusion, loss of control, or a lack of preparation on the speaker’s part.

It is important to note that the length and timing of conversation pauses can vary depending on the speaker’s culture, language, and personality. Some speakers may naturally use longer pauses, while others may use shorter pauses. The context of the conversation may also determine the length or type of pauses used. The best way to determine the appropriate length and timing of pauses in conversation is to observe others and practice using pauses in your conversations. If you find yourself stepping on another’s words or vice versa, you may want to pay more attention to the length and timing of your pauses.

In conclusion, the importance of pauses in conversations cannot be overemphasized; pauses play a crucial role in effective communication and should not be underestimated. By understanding the various functions of pauses and practicing their use, we can improve our ability to communicate effectively and build stronger relationships with others.