Perception is Reality…At Least for the Moment


I always remind my clients that “everything communicates”. How you appear in that moment, and sound in that moment to your listener, send a message about you.

The ability to be natural, who you are, and authentic, this is most people’s goal. I believe a great way to reach that goal is to: strengthen your ability to control the impression you make on others.  Perception is reality…. At least for the moment you are communicating it.

So the question is how does one control this in a world where so many things feel beyond our control?

Get ready- because taking your communication effectiveness to its next level is a 3 Level process.

Level one: Self-awareness. What is the current message you are sending? How are you projecting confidence and what may be taking away from that? Often my clients will say, “ I don’t like the sound of my voice” or “I never watch myself on video”. If you don’t hear it or see it, how can you know what is working?  Level one for many is the hardest part. Be brave.  

Try this: Turn your video on your phone and deliver a message to yourself, maybe it’s a quick business update or a voice message you’re about to leave. Watch it back. Grab a piece of paper and draw a line down the center.

  • On the left, note things that you see yourself doing that are projecting confidence. For example: Words that you’re saying that show understanding. Gestures you may be doing that are adding to the delivery of your message.
  • On the right hand side, jot down things you see that are taking credibility away from the message. Is there enough eye contact? Are your sentences clear of tentative sounding language? Is the voice tone matching the intention? Love your message?

Here’s where having your own Coach will be helpful. Because in addition to areas you notice, A good Coach will round out the list with some specifics you were not aware of. For example, care and feeding of dry vocal chords, especially if you are a ‘mouth breather’. That is someone who has no need to stop talking to take a breath thru the nose. He/she is able to breathe in thru their mouth and quickly exhale to produce sound.


Level 2:  Boost the Tool Kit

If you’re reading this, you already have a set of tools that are working for you. To complete Level 2 and reach that next level of effectiveness, list tools under headings where you can add tools under each. Areas could include: your nonverbal messaging, speech clarity, sounding confident. Then add 3 to 5 more specific communication tools to incorporate under each area. For example increase nonverbal credibility strengthening awareness of speaker space in front of you. Achieve by incorporating three purposeful gestures that you can use when delivering message you used for practice. For example, if you’re talking about growth, start with the hand facing each other and have them move slowly apart.


Level 3: Practice Practice Practice

With your arsenal of new tools, use one third of your awake time each day to practice. Rerecord the message using the chosen technique. It may feel unnatural at first, but by practicing it you will create muscle memory.  

Look for opportunities throughout your day. Whether it’s delivering your coffee order, or updating your team on a current project. The more you practice, the more habitual and natural the gestures become. A good coach will give you several tools to practice your structure and delivery.

With a bit of grit and determination you can now ask yourself – what is the perception of your listener? This person speaks with confidence!

Author

Spread the love

Author

MORE POSTS

Are you always in the weeds? Understanding your mindset is the key to stopping!

When communicating up the corporate ladder, the ability to curate information effectively is crucial. However, many people fall into the trap of oversharing details, driven by underlying psychological factors that can undermine their communication effectiveness. One of the primary reasons people feel compelled to overshare is the desire to validate their worth. The mindset of proving you’ve done a lot of work often stems from a need for recognition and approval. By sharing every detail,

Spread the love

Preventing Interruptions

Preventing interruptions begins by taking a closer look at the way you communicate your thoughts, ideas and suggestions. Beginning with the main point ensures that your listeners hear your most important insights before interruptions occur. Learn how in this one-minute video. Author Melody Elkin View all posts Spread the love

Spread the love

Executive Communication Coaching ~ An expanding and specialized field

Executive Communication Coaching (ECC) is a specialty within the leadership coaching field which focuses on imparting communication skill expertise to achieve individual, team and organizational success. ECC focuses on assessment and targeted goals, mindset change, skill presentation and practice; and is measured by observable results. Client self-discovery and insight are integral to the coaching process, as they greatly impact ability to integrate and apply new and effective strategies. ECC is distinguished from other Executive Coach

Spread the love

QUESTIONS? NEED HELP?

Tell us what’s on your mind: