Speaker Notes

Doc Rivers: No More Screaming Across the Court

By Laurie Schloff, Senior Coaching Partner

Take it from a speech coach: we need to protect our voices. Our vocal folds are vulnerable, as we overly expressive folks know well. One of our legion, Celtics Coach Doc Rivers, may be forced to stop screaming across the court after recent surgery to correct a benign growth on his vocal folds. He will be fine medically, but vocally, Doc will need to change his habits and find a different way to project.
Unfortunately, the human vocal mechanism does not come with a lifetime guarantee against wear and tear, and some of us, like Doc Rivers, are more vulnerable to breakdown. If you talk a lot, like many teachers or salespeople, or speak with a lot of force, like cheerleaders or construction foremen competing with machinery in the background, you have to be especially protective of your vocal health. Here are some warning signs and tips:

Warning Signs of Voice Trouble

1. Your voice sounds or feels sore or tired.
2. You sound hoarse.
3. You feel you have to strain to get your voice out.
4. You loose your voice intermittently.

Important: If you experience any of these symptoms longer than ten days, be sure to consult a physician.

To Maintain Maximum Vocal Health

1. Love your larynx – stop smoking. Each year on the American Cancer Society’s Great American Smokeout Day, I throw a “Love Your Larynx” party to celebrate the day I gave up smoking years ago.

2. Stay out of smoky or otherwise irritating environments.

3. Don’t scream. At a basketball or football game, just pretend you’re screaming. No one will notice. Moms and Dads, the Mr. Rogers Neighborhood voice of reason will be a more effective and healthy way of disciplining the kids.

4. Avoid clearing your throat and coughing, as well as making funny Donald Duck or other cartoon sounds.

5. Watch out for trying to talk above the din in noisy environments. One client wanted to have meaningful conversations in bars but found that she ended up with chronic hoarseness. The only solution was to save the meaningful mingling for quieter rooms.

6. Keep your throat moist by sipping liquids before, during, and after extensive use of your voice. Avoid ice-cold drinks, though, which can tighten your vocal muscles.

7. If you talk a lot, control your rate and volume. Avoid straining your voice. That is, bringing your vocal folds together with too much force. Speaking in a more gentle and flowing manner is less likely to cause a vocal breakdown.

8. Give your voice a chance to rest and you’ll be justifying some extra down time in your day.

What advice do you have for Doc?

Talking to the Top – Really!

by Laurie Schloff, Senior Coaching Partner

Business communication coaching is destined to be a continuously growing profession.
The reason is clear and simple. Communication talents are the key ingredient to maximizing your career success, standing out from the rest of the folks in your profession and reaching the top levels.

If you don’t believe this biased communication coach of thirty years, trust the decades of research among recruiters, interviewers and human resource professionals. Most recently, a study conducted by The National Association of College Administrators put it simply: verbal communication skills are the top attribute for success in job interviews and career growth. The recommendation: Young professionals would benefit from investing in their verbal excellence.

As I said….business communication coaches should be a valuable resource from here till eternity. Let us know, do you agree with the study? Are you investing in your speaking talents?

The Greatest Speaker Who Ever Lived – MLK

By Laurie Schloff, Senior Coaching Partner

Today we remember Dr. Martin Luther King. He was a man who changed the world through speech and he is regarded by many as the greatest public speaker who ever lived. So, I’d like to highlight three tips I share with leaders to help them to create their “dream” as a speaker:

1. Have a theme and repeat it frequently. More than the words “I have a dream”, it was the way MLK used them as a constant theme that made them live forever.

2. Develop a special sounding voice. MLK’s rich tone and the way he emphasized words with passion is a skill all can learn.

3. Say interesting things in interesting ways. Notice how MLK used alliteration, many words beginning with the letter c, and contrast between one idea and another in this most inspiring quote: He looked to the day when his four children “would not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character”.

Thank you Dr. King, for showing us the positive power of speech. Each of us has more communication power than we realize. Tell us what you think made Dr. King a great speaker and what YOU want to accomplish through speech.

Would You Wear A Sociometer?

By Dr. Dennis Becker, Principal, CEO & Senior Coaching Partner

What is it? Well, it’s a badge-like device you wear that measures nonverbal aspects of your interactions with others. It was created by Dr. Alex Pentland of MIT’s Media Lab. ” I built computer tools that can measure how much nervous energy you have”, says Pentland in an interview he did with The Wall Street Journal. Of course, for Speech Communication Coaches like us at The Speech Improvement Company, this has very interesting implications. For centuries, Speech Coaches have helped speakers with the nervousness surrounding speaking to groups with a few standard approaches. They focus on either helping speakers restructure their thought process about the speaking experience, or to develop a set of skills that will help them control the speaking experience. Both of these have proven helpful for different types of speakers. Dr. Pentland’s research based on the “sociometer” brings new information to the coaching process. His findings are reported in his book, “Honest Signals.”

Among his findings are:
- when two people are talking, the less pauses and shorter pauses there are indicates that there is more likely a greater interest in the other person
- the more fluidity or consistency a person has in their “tone or motion tells you who really knows what they are doing”
- when listening to a business plan, always “take it offline and read it”. Don’t just listen to it. It may be too easy to create buzz by the speaker.
- most of the important communication in organizations still happens face to face, not by email, phone, etc.

Combine these findings with the information provided by my colleague Laurie Schloff in her recent blog about non verbal behavior and hormones, and we begin to see a new and different way to help clients with those uncomfortable moments when we feel that being looked at makes us nervous. Stays tuned for what’s next.

Confidence Inside and Out: The Marriage of Communication Coaching and Hormonal Research

By Laurie Schloff, Senior Coaching Partner, The Speech Improvement Company

November 28, 2010

As a business communication coach, I am jumping for joy over a recent study which proves that purposely looking confident produces positive physiological changes. Harvard Business School Social Psychologist Amy Cuddy and Andy Yap, a PhD student at Columbia, reporting in Psychological Science, demonstrated that striking a power pose is not just a superficial fix. In fact, learning and using new body language quickly leads to increases in testosterone, a hormone which contributes to feeling assertive and strong, and the decrease of cortisol, associated with stress feelings and reactions.

Most clients want to be more confident and influential looking. Luckily, coaching for more effective gestures, movement and stance is the easiest of all the communication interventions. (I’ll also throw in my term for helping clients SIT strong- “sitz”, a twenty degree lean to show interest, with hands wide apart on the table to take up space.)

Now we can tell our clients that changes in nonverbal behavior leads to immediate positive internal changes as well. Now, we know that colleagues and bosses who describe clients as more effective and in control as a result of coaching are not just perceiving an enhanced stance, but an enhanced testosterone level as well. How rewarding to say to clients who change their leadership and influence image though coaching:
You’re looking—and feeling quite the powerhouse!

Have your worked on your nonverbal confidence? Tell us more.

What Did I Just Hear?

By Dr. Dennis Becker, Principal & Senior Coaching Partner

This is legitimate question for many people these days. It is, after all, election season. In this short note to everyone, I want to urge you to listen carefully to the candidates you may hear in debates and interviews. To me, these are much more valuable than the canned, rehearsed, scripted, polished and phony pictures we get in the “look alike” commercials we see at this time of year. Debates and interviews are a bit different…just a bit, though. Many of those encounters are just as canned. It seems that they are all so much alike. What I am urging in this note to everyone is to listen critically to the answers you get to the questions asked of the candidates.

First of all, listen to the questions. Are they clearly stated? Do you know what the questioner is trying to ascertain? Then, once you know that, listen to the response. If after you’ve heard the response, you are still not clear of what you just heard, don’t be too surprised. You can be upset. You can even be angry. Normally, however, you will not be educated. Candidates are very good at re-directing questions, even very specific questions. No, it’s not you. Candidates’ circuitous answers often make listeners feel too uninformed or unintelligent to follow the speaker’s response.

So what can you do to be better able to decide for whom you want to vote? Candidates that leave you wondering, “what did I just hear?”, are probably going to do the same thing if they get elected. Expect clear and direct answers to the questions asked. Vote for the candidate you can understand. Be a prepared and critical voter.

Well, Well, Well…Enough Already!

By Dr. Dennis Becker, Principal & Senior Coaching Partner

Have you noticed how often people begin speaking by saying “Well…”? Well, I have. It’s enough already! Why do they do it? What does it mean? Well, let’s explore it a bit:

First of all, a bit of empirical data will help frame these thoughts. I started noticing this trend about a year ago. At first, I thought nothing of it. It was just a figure of speech, I surmised. As a Speech Coach, however, I couldn’t ignore the increasing use of the word. Or, maybe it was just my increasing awareness of the word. Well, I decided to conduct some informal research. I began with television news interviews. WOW! “Well” was everywhere. In four of the Sunday morning news interview programs, on three different networks, I counted a total of 127 questions or comments made by the host(s). Of that number a total of 103 were responded to with statements beginning with “well…”. Interesting.

Interesting enough that I carried my informal research to the live settings of business meetings. As a Speech Coach, this is a common setting for me, so I had numerous opportunities to observe and count again. Over a period of one month I focused on five different meeting settings. These were in a variety of business genres including Healthcare, Biotech, Hi Tech, and Manufacturing. The average length of each meeting was one hour. The average number of participants was 4. Again, I was listening for how many time a speaker began his/her remarks with the word “well”. Unlike the TV research, I did not have the luxury of replay, so my count may have been a bit off actual numbers. Regardless, the premise of frequency of use was borne out. I counted a total of 203 comments. Of that number a total of 64 were initiated with the word “well”.

Well, well, well. It’s only informal research. Some folks will discount it on those grounds alone. None the less, it did serve to validate that I was not crazy about hearing that word so frequently. Why is this particular word so prevalent?

Well, I will venture an informal opinion to go with my informal research. The previous sentence serves as an example of my viewpoint. “Well” was used in that sentence to introduce the word “venture” in that sentence. “Well” was used in that sentence, as I believe it was used in most of all those measured, to indicate some tentativeness. As I thought about the comments on the TV news interview shows, it was was most certainly used as a way for the speaker to say “I may not be entirely secure or certain of what I’m about to say, but…”, or, “there may be some truth in what you asked, however,…”

When you listen a bit closer you can hear the meaning of “well” in some of our most well-known speakers:

Barack Obama’s “well”……..short, pointed, implying: “look, I’ve heard that before, but, here’s the truth…”
Glen Beck’s “well”………sing-songy, accompanied by a wagging head, implying: “how stupid is that…”
Oprah Winfrey’s “well”……..rising inflection, implying: “if that’s true, then guess what…”
Piers Morgan’s “well”…….short, almost a snort, implying: “no matter what you think, here’s the truth…”
Church Lady’s “well”……very sing-songy, accompanied by a squinting face, implying: “and you think that make you special…”
Most Hairdressers, “well”……resolved tone with raised eyebrow, implying: “ok, but don’t say I didn’t warn you…”

The word “well” seems to have become a universal indicator of caution or exemption for the following words. Its use allows the user to backtrack, if attacked or rebuffed, and restate or rephrase meaning or intent without acceptance of fault or inaccuracy, merely mis-interpretation. It is also used as a proclamation of skepticism on the part of the speaker, a subtle indicator of disagreement or question.

Perhaps, the most interesting “finding” in my informal research was that the use of the word “well” was heard much more frequently from speakers who supposedly had more education or stature in the community. Politicians were heavy users, academics were heavy users. Can we surmise that they are more tentative in expressing their opinions? Maybe. In any case, it’s worth noting. I urge you to notice it in your experiences, then to evaluate the following words for clarity and commitment.

Well, at least, ” well” isn’t as grating, nasty, annoying, ignorant, uncreative and childish as “like”. I dare you to try and count the number of times you hear that in a day. “You’d be like, ‘well, I’m like, well, you know.’ “.

Steven Slater: Service Traitor

By Laurie Schloff, Senior Coaching Partner

Hello people, rationality calling.

I feel real bad for Steven Slater.  Most of us would forgive him for reaching the flying freak out point one hot day in August.

We got the laugh and the vicarious revenge.  Apparently, many Americans are so fed up with the people or the boss they were hired to serve that flight attendant Steven Slater’s dramatic exit from JetBlue made them green with envy.

Sure, it’s a blast to bond over one giant slide revenge fantasy together—for a day.

But Slater’s no hero to those of us working for positive communication in the workplace. He made a rabid choice when he slid down that chute with two beers.   If only he had stopped at the beers and regained his bearing!

In addition to facing a possible seven years in prison for the most slapstick career buster ever, Steven Slater is a service traitor.

Too bad– with his know how and experience, he could have been a service first-rater.

Great service providers have to be able to take the cabin pressure.  They don’t give in to rudeness.   They break the routine by bonding in some small way with customers.  They pride themselves on keeping cool and use techniques to block negative emotion.

Service soldiers win medals for kindness, compassion and patience.  They nurture themselves with deep breaths, venting to a pal and a good foot massage.

Super servicers understand that customers can have bad days and even be bad people, but that great service providers are proud to be pleasant, even on their worst days.

Granted, Mr. Slater may end up hosting a “Take This Job and Shove It” reality show.

Sadly though, his inner reality is that he failed to be all he could be in the profession of service civility.

——

We would love your response to:

“What do you do when you are about to lose your cool at work?”

Rebels Rap for Peace – The Power of Symbols

By Dr. Dennis Becker, Principal & Senior Coaching Partner

Last week I was on vacation in Martha’s Vineyard , along with sixteen other family members.  It’s an annual thing.  We plan it a year in advance and all commit to it.  It’s great..  During the week, two separate  conversations  gave me pause to wonder about how we are interpreting symbols these days.  By symbols I mean those non-verbal , non-audio signs on everything from bill boards and busses to pants and purses .  TV, newspapers and magazines  are inundated with them.  Two  particular symbols come to mind.  What do you think?

1.    I happened into a conversation with some young folks while we all enjoyed ice cream.  It was a most enjoyable conversation .  That is , until I asked one question of a beautiful little girl sitting next to me.  She was eight years old.  She was adorned in all the usual impressionable eight year old fashion requirements. Those included a variety of items with peace symbols on them.  So, I asked her what that symbol meant.  She proceeded to tell me with unabashed confidence that it meant fun, friends, being comfortable, being cool, “and stuff like that”.  Curiously,  I got essentially the same response from a group of teenage girls, also enjoying ice cream,  sitting on an adjoining bench, and also  regaled with peace signs.

2.   Early one morning , as I braved the cold of the Atlantic along Inkwell Beach,  I  came across a young man,  17ish.    As we shivered together and shared tales of the sea creatures,  I asked the inevitable question ,”so where do you go to school?”

He told me the name of the school and proudly announced, ‘home of the Rebels!”

I asked  what the team and school logo was.  He said it was the rebel flag.  “Do you know what the rebel flag stands for?”, I asked.  “Pride in your school and your team”, he replied with some bravado.   “But, do you know what the rebel flag stands for,  what is is the symbol of”,  I persisted.  What followed was a sad commentary on the fact that although he had knowledge of the rebel flag as being a symbol of the old South,  he put the emphasis on  “old South”.  To him it was merely a symbol of his school and team.  That “other stuff”  didn’t have any relationship to these days and his school and team.  Nobody really cared about “that other stuff” any more.

These two particular incidents certainly made me wonder about how many other symbols we might have in contemporary society  that are being misconstrued.  For instance,  we see Rock stars, politicians, wen business people flashing the two fingered  V   shape on TV , street corners, and business offices every day.  Does it still have the same emotional attachments it had in the 60′s?  Does it still divide the hawks and doves?  I don’t think so.

Music is no exception.  We were among the first companies to get an 800 phone number.  We were able to get 1-800LETS RAP.  Catchy in those days.  A real challenge now.  We get so many phone calls from potential  “Rap stars”  who want  us to publish their  “songs”.

One of the most upsetting re-interpretations of a symbol was a recent production attended of the classic Broadway musical HAIR.  It had its origin the late 60′s when the war between those in favor of the Vietnam war and those opposed to it caused regular clashes.  A definite symbol of many who were opposed to it was the growth of long hair.  The Beatles had something to do with this too, I’m sure.  HAIR depicted  soldiers with guns at the ready being confronted by “Hippies” with long hair placing flowers into the rifles of the soldiers while singing and reciting “love not war” mantras.  Unfortunately, the production of HAIR which I attended recently,depicted the same scene with the  “hippies” throwing the flowers at the soldiers and shouting “love not war” in angry tones and daring postures.  It was a total misunderstanding of the message of  HAIR, let alone that era….”Hair like Jesus wore it…”   Remember that line?

So, it behooves us to be careful of how we use symbols and how we simply accept that the same symbol changes it’s meaning…OR NOT…with the passage of time.  It further behooves us to help younger generations clearly understand the hurt that can be inflicted due to a lack of knowing how that symbol  originated may be perceived by others.  I am very glad that I extended my conversations with that little girl and that teenage boy to the point where they thanked me and vowed to spread the accuracy of the symbol.  I hope I didn’t come across as too pedantic, but I believe in the words of St. Francis of Assisi who said,   “It is no good to walk somewhere to teach unless we teach as we walk”.

Symbols are very much a part of how we communicate .  When you see one being used in a questionable manner,  i invite you to ask about it.  The answers you get may be somewhat  upsetting.  That’s why the ice cream is so important.

Email Etiquette is Vital to Productive Communication in the Workplace

By Tori Aiello, Coach/Trainer at The Speech Improvement Company

Now more than ever email is changing the dynamics of how we communicate in the business world, and I have found that this type of communication is most efficient and effective when everyone in the same workplace agree to some “rules of the road” such as “Who do I need to cc?” or “What needs to be in the subject line?” or “When is it appropriate to forward?”.  In order to achieve this goal, I strongly encourage businesses to adopt, educate and reinforce professional email etiquette.  The result will be clear and more efficient electronic communication that increases productivity and camaraderie across the entire organization.